Spanking

What a harrowing thing to discipline a child. So far we've been able to get by with time outs. If Ingrid pours her milk in the philodendron or bites her cousin on the face then she goes to the bathroom for a time out until she is ready to say sorry and commit to not doing it again. Until last week we had never considered what we would do if she didn't stay in time out. Last week the unthinkable happened. During a time out, Ingrid opened the bathroom door and helped herself to a carrot from the fridge crisper.

What are we supposed to do? I know what you're thinking, "Why don't you just do time out in the shed." Well, we've tried that and it worked one time. But then Ingrid realized that time out in the shed was just like time out in the bathroom except with more toys. So here we are, convinced that it's important for our child to listen to us but without the tools to make that happen.

Could you spank this child?

 A few nights ago, in desperation I spanked Ingrid. She had come out of time out three times and finally I laid her across my knee and swatted her diapered rump. She craned her neck around and with wide, wet eyes burst into tears. She darted back to the bathroom, holding her face with both hands.

The next day when Ingrid wouldn't clean up her blocks Rachel started the time out count. "One, two ... I don't want to say the next number Ingrid."
"I'll clean up my blocks Mommy. I don't need spanking. Daddy gave me one yesterday and it is still working really great." But, last night after serial requests for cereal, Ingrid again wouldn't stay in time out. I told her that if she came out one more time I would have to give her a spanking, and sure enough she opened the door and came out.

This morning as we shared a bowl of cheerios Ingrid cheerfully said, "I don't like spankings, next time I'll do what you say." Oh how my heart stung when she said that.

What about this one?

But back to the question at hand (so to speak), what is the most effecting (or least damaging) way to teach a child about responsibility and consequences when they don't respect the rules? I often think about my brother Nate's comment, "We couldn't ever justify spanking because it seemed so hypocritical to teach your kid not to hit by, well, hitting them." On the other hand, how is being forced to stay in a room alone any less traumatic than getting spanked? Isn't the whole point of a negative consequence that the child doesn't like it?

Both Rachel and I were spanked growing up and we don't feel it traumatized us. I can remember my dad stepping into a room where mischief was being and slipping his belt off, making it into a loop, and pulling the ends to make an impossibly terrifying crack. If that wasn't enough he would lay us across his knees and spank us (with his hand, the belt was just theater). I bawled when I got spanked, not because of the pain, but because I knew how displeased my mom or dad was with me.

Is this just new-agey angst, or is there really a better way to help our children grow into responsible and loving people? Any insight would be appreciated.

"Number two is here"

I just got a call from Rachel.

"Number two is here."
"What should we do?" I asked, breathless and immediately in a cold sweat.
"Well do you still have the traps out?"
"What are you talking about?"
"I said, vole number two is here."
"Oh." I bowed my head and sunk back into my chair. "You've got to be more careful about that phrase 'number two'!"
"Well I was going number two and saw him run by the laundry basket. He looked like a little turd too, same dimensions, shape and everything." She obviously didn't grasp the intensity of the huge adrenaline rush she'd just caused me.
I chuckled and thought to myself, It can all change in a second when you're waiting for a baby.

Arctic biogeochemistry, Real Steel, and rollerblades

So, I've decided to treat myself with a thematic movie for each day of my comps. Today's questions were on arctic biogeochemistry and so I picked Hugh Jackman's new film Real Steel.

I forgot that nitrite was an intermediary in denitrification but I bet some boxing robots will make me feel better. 

On my way to the neighborhood Redbox I saw some rollerblade tracks in the snow. 

I just Googled "rollerblade tracks in the snow" and found this new invention by Scott Olson (best known for inventing rollerblades):

Check out his website, and make sure to hit play on the video for the full effect: Skyride

I'm laughing, but it is actually pretty cool. Here's a news report on some of the applications. I like how Scott makes sure to point out the rollerblade connection. Apparently they're thinking of installing one of these in Abu Dhabi's new capital and in the Denver airport.

Gems from a pile of emails

My comprehensive exam starts next week. It will consist of four days of written tests and then a few hours of oral examination. For the last three weeks I've been in full comps prep mode. I've found that I can't learn anything without feeling a compulsive need to write it down and cross-reference it.

In the heat of this panicked learning I've gotten way behind in my email. Working through the digital stack this morning revealed a few gems. In the spirit of exhaustive recording and cross-referencing here are some lines from those emails that struck me as particularly important (subject lines from the original emails below):

8. Your baby is losing that wrinkled alien look.

7. I am a conscientious objector on the dance....

6. we have been so busy chasing exotic animals

5. Just wanted to let you know that he has offered to show the RISE board the electric snowmobile next week at 2pm, for all who are interested.

4. I really don't like mice either, but then again, I was in New York City during that time. I might have done research on the transgenic mice found in the walls of my mission apartments.

3. I'm not sure what I would do in a race where hypothermia wasn't a clear and present danger.

2. Oy. The "Antarcticization of the Arctic"! 

And my favorite:

1. Happy April! Your Contaminants in the Polar Regions Coordinators, Emily, Igor, and Pedro

Happy April to you all as well.

(8. Your pregnancy: 33 weeks 7. Why this kolaveri di 6. camera back online 5. Electric Snowmachine 4. Already collaborating in 2004 3. sluice box? 2. Your NSF award 1. April is Contaminants in the Polar Regions!)

No caribou were harmed in the making of this memory

Well, we carried around our rifles for three days and called it good. Not only did we not see any caribou, we didn't see anything that could crawl, walk or fly until we got back to the car (two ravens and a family of ptarmigan were hanging out by the haul road). 

From the tracks and turds we figured the herd had been through the area in the last week.

 

Scat+wind=flying buttresses

Do you see anything Robert? 

The snow conditions varied from wind-scoured dunes to deep fluffy wallows.

Whole sections of the hillslope were trampled out like this where the caribou had hoofed down to the lichen and moss below. You could see tracks from fox, hare, and weasel that came in afterward to take advantage of the exposures.

 We skied down a narrow canyon to check for caribou. We then skied back out.

 There was absolutely no wind (even our frosty tent fly didn't make any noise through the night). The northern lights were bright enough to see by, not that anything was moving in the Chandalar Valley.

Besides us shuffling from the tent to the pee spot and back.

Robert is a big Dune fan too, so on our way back to the car, we pretended like we were Fremen wearing stillsuits dodging Harkonnen thopters and watching for worm-sign. We didn't see any worms.

Back in the trees on the way home. Some of the Black Spruce were more snow than tree.

For the complete "hunt" pictures click here.

Hunting again

"And it is pleasing unto me that they should not be used, only in times of winter, or of cold, or famine ... the beasts of the field, and the fowls of heaven, and all wild animals that run or creep on the earth; and these hath God made for the use of man only in times of famine and excess of hunger." Doctrine and Covenants 89:13-15


Tomorrow I am going hunting again. Me, an otherwise vegetarian, driving up the Trans-Alaskan pipeline road with some skis and a rifle to break up some caribou's family. How did I get here?

A borrowed gun, gifted book, and knives from Steepandcheap

I'm opposed to turning vibrant living beings into meat on ethical, religious, ecological, and health grounds, but here it is 1:30 AM, and I'm looking down the scope of a 30-6 in my living room. What is it about this issue that has short circuited all the social and internal systems that are supposed to help me make ethical and good decisions?

My friend Robert invited me on this hunt a couple weeks ago. We would park somewhere around the Chandalar Shelf airstrip, ski out of the five-mile no-shooting pipeline corridor, and hunt to the south east. I have a hard time saying no to a game of chess, let alone a multiday, snow-cave building ski adventure.

To make things even morally muddier, yesterday, while trying to track the herd online, I found out that the tracking project name is the CircumArctic Rangifer Monitoring and Assessment Network (CARMA). Perfect. It turns out that CARMA stopped posting the herd's location because of hunters just like me.

Several times I've come close to canceling the trip, but each time something stops me. "How many people actually have this opportunity," my inner Gargamel will whisper. "You're providing for your family after all."

"Sure but I can also provide for my family with the box of Kashi seven grain pilaf I picked up at Fred Meyers."

"It is a time of winter. The word of wisdom clearly makes this exception."

"Sure, but that's only because times of winter were times of famine in those days. I've got romaine lettuce and fresh bananas downstairs. Plus read verse 15, it says only in times of famine AND excess of hunger. Pretty clear right?"

The good news is, Robert gives us a 20% chance tops of actually seeing any caribou. But what does this say about me? I'm hoping that dumb luck will save me from committing a sin I'm not strong enough to resist. My moral compass is experiencing some serious declination at these latitudes.

Cake pops

I had two cake pops today. When I woke up I didn't even know what that was. I also didn't know we got eight inches of snow last night (the first fall of more than four inches this year) until I walked out the door, already almost late.

With a couple other graduate students I'm co-teaching a basic ecology course. Today we talked about decomposition. Did you know that Archaea are the only organisms that create methane and they are only present in about half of humans' guts. That means that only half of us are emitting flammable flatulence.

Halfway down the ridge a Toyota Yaris tried to pass me on a curve. The tiny wedge shaped car became a wedge shaped fountain of powder as it crossed the piled snow on the dividing line. I thought for sure he was going off the road but he was able to slow down fast enough to barely make the turn. We waved at each other and he sped off.

I made it to class five minutes early but then I realized that the tiny netbook computer I'd bought from my Czech friend Vladen was powered down. With some 256 Mb of RAM it takes 15 minutes to load Windows XP. I hit the power button and started chatting with the students. Twenty minutes later I gave up and one of the students loaded my presentation on his laptop.

"What's Breaking Dawn?" Kevin asked after popping my flash drive in.
"Oh you know, just a story about a vampire and a human that love each other very much." I knew I should have emptied the trash after deleting that from the drive.

Tonight we shoveled the driveway. I scooped snow while Rachel pulled Ingrid behind in a sled, acting like a little compactor. Ingrid started with one leg hanging over the side of the sled. After ten minutes all four limbs and the back of her head were dangling and dragging as Rachel pulled her along.

The crazy thing is, the cake pops were from two totally unrelated people. One was the size of a golfball and chocolate, the other was the size of a big grape and berry flavored. They were good but I can't help but think that they'll never beat the real thing, or even cupcakes.