Freedom Toast

In the last few days before the election I'm sure you all must be wondering, "How can I make better French toast?" Or you might be asking yourself, "What am I going to do with this rock-hard loaf of artisan bread I forgot while listening to another report about Ohio." Well, today, loosen your belt of civic duties a few notches, and let me come in like the federal government to solve both problems for you.

 In case you've ever wondered what they call French toast in France, it's called pain perdu. This simply means "lost bread." Like so many inventions it was invented accidentally (like sticky notes and silly putty), by a man named Pierre who forgot a baguette under a pile of berets and miniature Eiffel Tower replicas. A week later, while trimming his mustache, Pierre found the bread and was about to throw the crusty mess out his window when a voice inside said, "Why don't you soak it in egg and fry it up." You don't need to wait a full week to enjoy the fruits of Pierre's forgetfulness, any bread you didn't get around to finishing will do.

  1. Saw through the fossilized loaf with a serrated knife so it doesn't crack.

 2. Move any hungry babies out of reach (slobber might be a good softening agent though)

 2. Soak the bread in a mix of egg and milk (3 eggs and one half cup milk works for half a baguette). You can also add vanilla, cinnamon, nutmeg, flaxseed or whatever you fancy. The longer you soak the bread the softer it will be (I like a short soak for chewy toast).

 3. Melt half a tablespoon of butter in a pan and cook the soaked slices.

4. Top with butter, syrup, and powdered sugar and serve with milk and a tiny picture of your candidate of choice.